Sunday, January 30, 2011

Psychedelic Sunday

Some how today the Cattleman, my daughter and I got in this huge discussion about one of my favorite bands and what their songs really mean.

This song par example:



My daughter thought it was about sex...SEX? are you kidding? It be about drugs...right?

Heh...according to  Wiki:  Lead singer John Kay wrote the song; the lyrics "I like to dream, right between my sound machine" came from his inspiration from listening to a hi fi stereo  system he bought with royalties from his first album.

Well now thats kinda boring isn't it...who would have thunk that? Seems so ordinary and mundane for a Born to be wild kinda guy. Non?

Now take my ultimate favorite tune of theirs:




Now it pretty obvious it is about drugs right? For me? Not so much...... it is about the evils of ( feel free to insert your pejorative right here). How it will take your soul if you let it. Look at some of the lyrics. I just see so many folks lead joyless dead lives on a rat wheel in pursuit of the next perfect granite counter top, big screen T.V.  vaycay or car. Maybe we all of have our "drug" of choice for comfort of mind and soul eh?


Go figure, I know it seems pretty clear cut but it works for little old convoluted me....art, everyone sees what they wanna see I guess.



You know I smoked a lot of grass.
Oh Lord! I popped a lot of pills.
But I've never touched nothin'
That my spirit couldn't kill.
You know I've seen a lot of people walking 'round
With tombstones in their eyes.
But the pusher don't care
If you live -- or if you die.
God Damn! The pusher.
God Damn! The pusher.
I said God Damn! God damn the pusher man.
You know the dealer, the dealer is a man
With a lump of grass in his hand.
But the pusher is a monster
Not a natural man.
The dealer for a nickel
Goin to sell you lots of sweet dreams.
Ah...but the pusher will ruin your body;
Lord he'll leave your mind to scream.
God Damn! The pusher.
God Damn! God damn the pusher.
I said God Damn! God damn the pusher man.
Well now if I were the president of this land
You know I'd declare total war on the pusher man.
I'd cut him if he stands, and I'd shoot him if he run,
And I'd kill him with my bible, and my razor and my gun....
GOD DAMN! The pusher
God damn the pusher.
I said God damn! God damn the pusher man!





Saturday, January 29, 2011

Son of a gun....

I was supposed to spend this weekend at the Hunter's safety course and writing for my Possession and Acquisitions Licence. Been looking forward to it for months (working up to it for perhaps years) for crying out loud., What am I actually doing?

Knee deep in fevered, sick with the flu children is what I am up to........

At this rate of life's co-operation, I figure this will be me when I finally get my permit to buy a rifle.......

Photobucket

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Behold and learn.......

Today is minus 29C. A wee bit too cold to insist the children play out for any great length of  time. Loud is an issue as it is, even with out having a friend over with her children and us all being locked in a house.

A conversation at my dinning table while children are having snack time.

Critter one: Mommy I wish we had a chameleon.

Critter two: Yeah , I want one too!!

Grey: But we do have a chameleon.

Critter one: We do.

Critter three: I never saw it.

Grey: I know, I haven`t seen it since the day we got it.

Critter four: Where did it go

Grey: Last time I saw it was headed downstairs and we never saw it again.

Critter one: Can we go find it

Grey: Knock yourself out. (As I take a sip of tea and wink at my friend.)

All manner of little people scamper off to find the missing chameleon.

Grey`s  friend: You`re evvvvvvvvvvvvvil.....

I know..

Thursday, January 20, 2011

No Knead Baguettes anyone?

How about this set of Baguettes.........

Grey's Bagettes

Made these a few days ago with a "No Knead" method. Very easy and the dough makes enough for 4 count 'em 4  delicious baguettes. Best part of it you don't have to make all the baguettes at once. You can make one or all four at a time for your convenience. Option to make them the initial day of the mixture and up to 10 days  later. A very flexible recipe.  The dough really stays nice for that long, as a matter of fact the bread's flavour changes and enriches with age.

BTW you can also make Boule (regular round  loaves of  bread) Great Pizza dough or flatbread from this recipe too.

Basic No Knead Recipe:

Ingredients:

6 1/2 cups  of unbleached all purpose or bread flour.

1 1/2 tablespoons  of instant or bread machine yeast.

1 1/2 tablespoons of table salt or kosher salt.

3 cups of lukewarm water about 100 F/ 38 C  (No hotter or you will kill the yeast).

Directions:

Put dry ingredients in a large plastic container. I use a Tupperware clone container and just DO NOT fully shut it during rise and storage, this is a live dough that requires breathing. Make sure it is well mixed a whisk works great here. You will not be mixing it much with the liquids so it is important to make sure the yeast is distributed.

Add your warm water and stir until just moistened. Now Beat with a large spoon ( wooden) about forty strokes scraping the bottom flour up  and getting  the sides Incorporated. The dough will form a lumpy sticky mass.

Rise: cover your bowl with plastic wrap or loosely put on top of Tupperware clone type container for about two hours at room temperature in a draft free place (I'm not sure why draft free, but practically every bread recipe since time began says "draft free" so I decided there must be a good reason and chose to comply on this small matter.) The dough will take on a sponge like appearance something like this:



No Knead dough

DO NOT PUNCH DOWN THIS DOUGH!

To make your Baguette:


The dough is now ready to be used or put in the fridge until you bake. Up to 9 more days. You have enough dough for 4 baguettes. I tend to make at least two at a time.

First I flour my hands then I grab my kitchen scissors, ( you might want to flour your scissor blades two) yes I said scissors and I snip the dough into half and then those halves into haves. I have 4 approx the same sized hunks of very sticky dough.

Working the dough as little as possible (and adding flour as necessary) form each piece into a cigar shape around 14  inches long. Don't stress. This is pretty easy, the dough is not stiff at all, I tend to just hold it up and allow it to stretch it's self a bit, then put it on the floured surface and gently pull/stretch it the rest of the way to it's desired length. Coat with flour while working (this is really sticky stuff) outside will become soft and smooth like a baby's bottom. No sticky areas should be felt. Pinch each end to a point. Not to worry if they are not the same they seem to all bake and taste wonderful regardless.

As I finish shaping each baguette I used to place them on a cookie sheet or piece of parchment paper with cornmeal scattered on it. Not anymore my hubby made me this baguettte shaper/riser/baker out of  sheet metal, it looks like a W with a flat bottom, so now I place the parchment paper on the it, the cornmeal and I let them rest/ rise  (and later bake) on that. Let rest covered with a tea towel for about 40 minutes.

About 30 minutes before the baguettes will be ready I heat up the oven  ( 450F) with the baking stone on a rack and a empty metal pan on the bottom shelf of the oven. ( You will be adding two cups of water to that metal pan to steam the bread, it gives the bread a wonderful bakery crust, dark, thin and crispy.)

Before you place your baguettes in the oven you need to score them a few times. You can use a very sharp knife, but I again just snip them on the top a few times with my kitchen scissors. 

Now you can put the cookie sheet in the oven or slide the parchment paper onto the baking stone or what ever method works for you. Really I am NOT trying to complicate this :O) You can use just about any baking utensil/method and (I have) and it still works out wonderfully.

Quickly stuff it in the oven and put the water in the metal pan and close that oven door as fast as you can to keep as much of the steam in as possible.

Bake for 25 minutes. Crust will be a medium darkish brown colour, also have a somewhat hollow sound when tapped on the bottom.

Cool as long as you can stand to wait to eat.

p.s. I quickly snapped a photo or two of the cut baguette to show how nice the "crumb" is. Unfortunately I took crumby photos and it was badly out of focus. :O(

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Mommy Tips from gwyneth of oblivia

Gwyneth Paltrow gives us lowly Mommies the wisdom of her experience and tips on making it all work.




I've compiled some of the most helpful advice here. Real moms should adopt these tips immediately in an effort to better manage their schedules and lead less hectic lives.
  • Have a personal trainer come to your house, preferably on Mondays. This will be great motivation for working out the rest of the week.
I got you beat, I have 8 personal trainers that live in my house, I run, pick up and lift weights from 10 to 45lbs in steady repetition on a consistent basis daily.
. 
  • Have a weekly blow-out. This means that you don't need to wash your hair each day and can save time in the morning.
Wash my hair every morning????????? Doesn't that make your hair fall out or something?????? That can't be healthy. Ponytails hide all Manner of hair sins, even roots, but oddly not the greys,.

  • Get an amazing assistant.
I have an amazing assistant, but he goes out everyday and works his behind off in order to feed, provide for my personal Trainers and keep me in expensive shampoos , elegant exfoliates, scrubs and body washes, we call it Irish spring or dove or lever 2000.. 

  • Condense your spa appointments. For example, JB has a salon she goes to at the end of the day to have a facial, manicure, and pedicure at the EXACT same time. She's in and out in 70 minutes.
What's a spa? Soap, water (non-bottled, non-imported, non-carbonated), a loofah and nail clippers, squeezed in between shouts of "Mommy? Where are you" and " Billy fell down the well again".  It's all good.

  • Get seven hours of uninterrupted sleep a night.
I don't have any idea what Seven hours of sleep looks like let alone stringing them together. Nor do any of my friends who have a "normal" number of children. For me, I think it last happened back in 19 and 90 something

  • Get a fishmonger who delivers. This way you can always have fish in the house and can be prepared in case you need to whip up a quick fish dinner.
Someone delivers Captain hi-liner and frozen french fries? Cool, gonna look into that. I just buy food at a grocery store and put it in this weird thing called a FREEZER or refrigerator.  Why did you have to ruin things and use the F word? Every landlocked Mamma on the planet knows that no self respecting person under 4 feet will eat the F word. It is NOT fish it is called "special chicken". Just like broccoli is not broccoli, it is called baby trees, parsnips are not parsnips, they are yellow carrots.


Depending on the kindness of strangers.

Not always a good plan.

Josh Brown’s eyes welled up as he recalled desperately clinging on to his friend who dangled 10 metres above the ground at an Uxbridge ski resort — and the shock when he slipped from his grasp.

“It was the longest five minutes of my life,” said Josh, 13, sitting outside his friend Kyle Armstrong’s room at Sick Kids hospital on Sunday, where the boy is being treated for seven fractured vertebrae, two broken ribs, and a punctured lung.
Kyle plunged onto the snowy hill of Lakeridge Ski Resort around 6:15 p.m. Friday, after slipping under a safety bar of an ascending ski lift. The two Whitby boys insist that Josh’s ski pole was the cause.
“I guess my pole got in the way when he sat down and so it acted as a ramp and brought him down,” he said.

That's a very unfortunate accident, but when you do sports you take risks associated with that sport.

However:


While some are hailing Josh as a “young hero,” others are raising questions about why two adults riding in the same chair didn’t offer help.
“I’m talking to them saying, ‘Please help me,’ and they’re just like, ‘You gotta pull yourself up, bud,’ ” said Josh.
Witnesses told staff at the ski resort that the two men were seen skiing away after the fall.

WTHeck? Two  supposedly grown "men" sit beside this young man, on the same bench and just offer pithy advice to pull yourself up? A-Holes.

So no kindness in this case from strangers, how about your neighbours?

Again..some not fairing any better.


A 66-year-old woman with Alzheimer's disease froze to death after she collapsed on a driveway near her home Monday. Neighbours heard her cries for help, but no one responded and no one called 911.
The temperature dipped down to minus 20 degrees Celsius Sunday night and early Monday and an extreme cold weather alert was in effect across Toronto.

And.

There were also scratch marks on the screen door of the home. The woman had called out for help and neighbours heard her, yet no one came outside to assist her or even called 911. "I can tell you around 2am, through our investigation, there's a couple of neighbours in the area who did hear a scream," Toronto Police Sgt. David Dube said.
 "I think one of them actually saw this person in a bit of distress but didn't know what was going on but did not call us," added Dube.

Well isn't that special?  The evolution of Civilization is happily trotting along, Rome didn't have much on us baby.

Monday, January 17, 2011

That's gonna leave a mark.

When ordered by your betters make it snappy or it's a boot to the head for you.







Police in B.C. are recommending a charge of assault causing bodily harm against a Kelowna RCMP officer in connection with a videotaped incident showing an officer kicking a seemingly compliant man in the face during an arrest.

The announcement was made Sunday shortly before a noon-hour protest in the Interior B.C. city of Kelowna in response to the arrest of Buddy Tavares on Jan. 7.

About 300 people marched from Kelowna City Park to the RCMP detachment in a protest that remained peaceful in spite of earlier police concerns that it might get out of hand.

Heh...... of course the planned protest had nothing to do with the recommendation. (don't get excited folks it is after all just a recommendation . No charges yet. ) This fine specimen of a police officer has been on paid vacation since the incident in question. These guys have been right on this case of possible abuse from day one don't cha know.
“When an officer is caught on video assaulting a citizen, the force needs to act swiftly and decisively,” Davies said in a news release Sunday morning before the Abbotsford police announcement about charges.
“It is insulting that the officer involved is simply relieved of duties, with pay, while the broken police investigation process drags on.”
Opps my bad.
Now for something completely different, but on point.








Sunday, January 16, 2011

Psychedelic Sunday

In honour of this song being Banned in good ol Canerder this week by the CRTC, all because one sensitive soul in Newfoundland was offended by one little word....context means nothing...sheesh it's embarrassing ....

Friday, January 14, 2011

Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied

with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.


Mammoth 'could be reborn in four years'

The woolly mammoth, extinct for thousands of years, could be brought back to life in as little as four years thanks to a breakthrough in cloning technology.


Seems like a great idea non? But just where have I seen this idea before? Oh Yeah.....   :O)

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Friday, January 7, 2011

Yarths..

This is unfortunately not so unusual,

A dinner lady who was sacked for mentioning a bullying incident to a child's parents has won her unfair dismissal case.

Carol Hill, 60, witnessed seven-year-old Chloe David being tied to a fence and whipped with a skipping rope by four children at Grey Tey primary school near Colchester in Essex.

Assuming the school had reported the incident to the child's parents, Mrs Hill later mentioned it to them. Chloe's parents had been informed by the school that their daughter had suffered the rope burns on her wrist and whip marks on her legs in a 'minor accident', with no mention of the bullying.

I have  few issues with this story.
 

WTHeck? What sort of parent swallows that the wrist rope burns and whip marks on their 7 year old's legs were the result of an minor accident. Just  exactly what kinda unthinking idiot believes that fairy tale just because they have been programmed to trust the lying, covering their behinds from liability, school official who told them so? I am, as they say, Gob-smacked...

Well of course the school had to make an example of the concerned employee who innocently spoke the TRUTH to the parents.  They can't have interactions between school officials, students and parents that is honest and above board now can we?  People might question what is really going on in those aptly named institutions that they daily entrust  their children to..

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Lola the wonder dog..

My dog is small, therefore it is rather safe to assume the brain in her wee head is even more wee.  All of 5 lbs this pure bred pain in the tuckus is crazy making for moi.

Lola is a timid thing who just sort of started doing her business in the house again. I didn't know but miniature dogs are notorious for this behaviour. Not good for this germaphobic mamma. I've tried to train her but if she wants to go the bathroom she just sits at the dinning room sliding door and waits...and waits....no bark...no pawing at the door, nothing. She must think I am physic or really do have those rumoured eyes in the back of my head or my rear end. Well this can be a busy house, every so often I fail in my duty to notice that she has perched herself in silent need.. No response from the humans equals she goes off and finds a convenient place to make her deposit.

Fine...... this is no good, but partly our fault, so off I go to  talk to the dog trainer guy AGAIN. (Ya know I never needed help with the other gazillion real dogs I have owned over the years...but I digress...again.) He suggested that I get this budgie bell, put it on a stick-em , lick it and slap it to the door so she can ring the bell to indicate her needs. Insert visual of blinky eyed Grey Lady here.

Riiiiight like that will work. I can't get her to go outside to do her business but I will be able to get her to ring a bell? Riiiiight.  He must have seen my dubious look and went on to explain that every time she messed in the house I was to take her to the bell, grab her paw and swipe the bell with it. OK it's worth a try at less then $2 for the bell.

Buy the bell, apply the bell, when Lola does her business I clean the mess then go grab up the wonder pet and swipe the bell with her paw and stuff her out the door. This goes on and on and Lola? She no get it...

Bear (an 8 lb genius compared to Lola) who barks his tuckus off at the door to go out got it just buy watching, I wasn't even trying to train him. The frickin cat learned within a few days, just by watching my silly antics.

The cat soooo loved it in fact that it started ringing the bell for everything it wanted, including her demands for food. She majestically sits by the bell, rings it and if she wants out she faces the door, if she wants food she prances into the kitchen. Must be quicker delivery service or something. Works for the cat, we and by we I mean me, live to serve apparently.

Now the children are fascinated by this whole process, very eager to do their part, they have decided it is their job to let ME know, at the top of their lungs, from what ever room they happen to be in, up stairs, downstairs, main floor, when ever the bell has been rung. Why you ask? They are subscribing to the well known scientific tenant that Mamma's that have several extra sets of eyes are robbed of hearing at certain frequencies...YES, obviously it is all part of that karmic theory of balanced use of appendages and orifices. What helpful children they are, I am so proud.

Called the Dog trainer guy again to confer and he says  to stick with it she is a high strung yet timid number, but not to worry, it will work out...eventually.... So we stick with it, same routine every time, find a mess tell her no, take her to the door, stuff her outside and then clean up the mess.

Success at last, Lola is using the bell, every single time.

 Just what did Lola the wonder brain understand from the weeks of training? She now makes a mess and then rings the bell to let me know that a clean up crew is required....she doesn't even bother sitting silently at the door any more, no not my hip, happening, I got what you have been trying to teach me Lola. Nope she now just does her mess then runs for the bell to announce it.........I may be sloooooooooow but something tells me that something has been lost in translation somewhere.

Out witted by a dog with a brain the size of a pistachio......

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Looking like a shovel and a waterproof strong box

are about to be the order of the day,

The most striking example is Hungary, where last month the government made the citizens an offer they could not refuse. They could either remit their individual retirement savings to the state, or lose the right to the basic state pension (but still have an obligation to pay contributions for it). In this extortionate way, the government wants to gain control over $14bn of individual retirement savings.

At least 5 countries have taken over pension funds and some  private savings?

Well of course they did.  What else could they do? Stop spending before they impoverish the whole populace that slaves for them that they are charged to take care of?

Not like this would be startling here in good ol Canerder eh. We had a lovely Prime Minister unilaterally decided to steal the dedicated surplus from the Employment insurance program for what ever he saw fit. Well he had to, you see he was short of that other passel of stolen funds we affectionately call taxes for his spending habits he refused to curb.

Reaction? Outrage? Riots in the streets? Errrr no not really, not tooo much was said about that drive mauling. Of course since then the program has been underfunded to a point where it is almost impossible to collect and not have clawed back if you ever made a decent wage or don't have seasonal employment.

Stealing from Peter to pay Paul.

Yup a shovel and a good waterproof strong box are starting to sound right just about now....Buy gold and silver, our paper is rotting.

Monday, January 3, 2011

I'd probably like myself better if.....

I didn't find this so  funny.



We all have our faults don't we? I'll work on it O.K. ?

H/T C.C.

Celine on a Nanny state roll

Celine Hervieux-Payette has reintroduced her bill to ban spanking:

Liberal Sen. Celine Hervieux-Payette has tabled bill S-204 which would repeal section 43 of the Criminal Code. Section 43 allows teachers, parents or a person standing in the place of a parent to use force as a means of discipline "if the force does not exceed what is reasonable under the circumstances." Force could include picking up a child and removing them from a situation against their will. 
Jeepers Celine you are aware that not a single vote has been cast for you since 1980 right? That no one gives a rodent's behind what your opinion is on anything, that you have been rejected at least three times by the lowly electorate? That you are nothing but a political crony appointment ? Perhaps you could just  collect your ill gotten gains and lay low like a normal thief would? Oh no not you Celine....

Parents do not own their children. Children are individuals. Their protection should therefore take precedence over the protection of adults and over the imaginary risk of legal action against them.”

That may be so, for some, then why are parents being held responsible for their childrens actions? ( well it can't be their children if the parents do not own them...well now I am just confused by this whole concept.)  If the children are NOT mine Celine do you imagine they are the property of the state? Should we just all hand over our ovaries and sperm. Let the state make some kinda cocktail and throw them in cute sterile test tubes and when these soldiers of the state are born place them in nice clean BORG maturation chambers run by  those whom you can trust to raise them?

I'm all about protecting the children....from abuse. I used to be in the child protection racket for that very reason. But discipline and abuse are two veeeeery different matters aren't they? I have never been a "spanker" myself. I think it lacks imagination and is counter-productive to a child learning respect for people and their bodies. It's just like schools failing to stop bullying because most teachers and the school system spends it's whole time bullying the child in one form or another. It defies logic, it is not MY practice to spank, but I can certainly see it as a part of the parenting arsenal. See Celine as you said children are indeed individuals, not every parenting technique  works the same way on each child. I know this may be a hard concept to grasp but some kids you just have to give "the look" to and voila you have instant compliance, another child? Not so much.

I also think that NOT teaching children, spoiling them, by not making them behave in a  acceptable manner is an under rated form of abuse.

Full disclosure: While I have never "spanked" I must confess that I have tapped a hand or two when that hand has been stretched out to touch plugs or a hot stove. No marks or injuries ensued from my actions Celine.

Come on Celine,  forcibly removing a child against their will is to be banned by yours truly? So if a child is about to walk into a busy street and does not feel like listening to a  request to not do such a dangerous thing it will be illegal to pick them up and remove them from the street against their will? So if I am camping and the children insist on walking on the rim of the fire pit a soft tap on the derriere after picking them up and forcibly removing them from the rim of the lit fire pit will be against the law? If a child continues to bite other children it will be illegal to pick that child up and put them in their room? Time outs are now on the outs?

Wow just wow.......you know the tables have certainly turned from the days when the role of government was to serve you and yours. No question these folks think you are here to serve their ends.

Anybody tired of tax eaters and their act yet?

Sunday, January 2, 2011

More from the sisters of the talking victimhood pants....

Oh my these types of so called  "feminists" burn my britches.

A Liberal senator wants to use the power of Parliament to force women into the boardrooms of the nation.
Sen. Celine Hervieux-Payette, a former Montreal business executive, is behind Bill S-206. The bill would require all publicly traded companies, banks, insurance companies and trust companies to have 50% of their board of directors made up of women.





Ummm out of date much Celine honey? Let me fill you in on a wee secret shall I? We don't need your type of affirmative action that only screams "females are too dumb or too weak or too whatever to get ahead in this country" and it's all those eeeeevil  men's fault.

Cause you know what? Most of us just don't swallow it any more. We have lived a real life and know that career paths more often then not are restrained by...CHOICES.....that we, the women  out having a real life, make every day. Are there places that are unfair to women? I am sure there are, but what makes you think I or any other self respecting female would be interested in wasting our talents on those a-holes? I don't want to work for anyone that doesn't think I am the next best thing to come down the pipe instead of being the someone that was shoved down their pipe hole. Got it Celine?


I also have issue with these "holier then thou, let me bestow this upon the little people from on high" parasites  that cherry pick their human rights like they are hors d'oeuvres.


 Celine you seem to exemplify a tunnelled vision hypocrite type of fem bot, Please listen up honey. You want equal rights in this country? How about cleaning up your own backyard? How about working to  stop the out right discrimination of the  English women in my fine home province Quebec? How about you step out of your box and think of your ENGLISH sisters in Quebec who are lucky to get  a house cleaning job if they can't pass your "stupid, designed to be impossible standard to pass" french test that folks with french sounding names never have to take. Those women that can not educate their children in the language of their choice?


Non? I guess they can just eat poutine eh Celine? Dans ton derriere Celine. Please just go away your embarrassing to any female with any pride or dignity.

Oh and Celine please step away from the trough,  you should be ashamed to be a parasite for life, where is your pride gal? Go out and get a real job like the rest of your sisters you pretend to be so concerned about.......


.