Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Lola the wonder dog..

My dog is small, therefore it is rather safe to assume the brain in her wee head is even more wee.  All of 5 lbs this pure bred pain in the tuckus is crazy making for moi.

Lola is a timid thing who just sort of started doing her business in the house again. I didn't know but miniature dogs are notorious for this behaviour. Not good for this germaphobic mamma. I've tried to train her but if she wants to go the bathroom she just sits at the dinning room sliding door and waits...and waits....no bark...no pawing at the door, nothing. She must think I am physic or really do have those rumoured eyes in the back of my head or my rear end. Well this can be a busy house, every so often I fail in my duty to notice that she has perched herself in silent need.. No response from the humans equals she goes off and finds a convenient place to make her deposit.

Fine...... this is no good, but partly our fault, so off I go to  talk to the dog trainer guy AGAIN. (Ya know I never needed help with the other gazillion real dogs I have owned over the years...but I digress...again.) He suggested that I get this budgie bell, put it on a stick-em , lick it and slap it to the door so she can ring the bell to indicate her needs. Insert visual of blinky eyed Grey Lady here.

Riiiiight like that will work. I can't get her to go outside to do her business but I will be able to get her to ring a bell? Riiiiight.  He must have seen my dubious look and went on to explain that every time she messed in the house I was to take her to the bell, grab her paw and swipe the bell with it. OK it's worth a try at less then $2 for the bell.

Buy the bell, apply the bell, when Lola does her business I clean the mess then go grab up the wonder pet and swipe the bell with her paw and stuff her out the door. This goes on and on and Lola? She no get it...

Bear (an 8 lb genius compared to Lola) who barks his tuckus off at the door to go out got it just buy watching, I wasn't even trying to train him. The frickin cat learned within a few days, just by watching my silly antics.

The cat soooo loved it in fact that it started ringing the bell for everything it wanted, including her demands for food. She majestically sits by the bell, rings it and if she wants out she faces the door, if she wants food she prances into the kitchen. Must be quicker delivery service or something. Works for the cat, we and by we I mean me, live to serve apparently.

Now the children are fascinated by this whole process, very eager to do their part, they have decided it is their job to let ME know, at the top of their lungs, from what ever room they happen to be in, up stairs, downstairs, main floor, when ever the bell has been rung. Why you ask? They are subscribing to the well known scientific tenant that Mamma's that have several extra sets of eyes are robbed of hearing at certain frequencies...YES, obviously it is all part of that karmic theory of balanced use of appendages and orifices. What helpful children they are, I am so proud.

Called the Dog trainer guy again to confer and he says  to stick with it she is a high strung yet timid number, but not to worry, it will work out...eventually.... So we stick with it, same routine every time, find a mess tell her no, take her to the door, stuff her outside and then clean up the mess.

Success at last, Lola is using the bell, every single time.

 Just what did Lola the wonder brain understand from the weeks of training? She now makes a mess and then rings the bell to let me know that a clean up crew is required....she doesn't even bother sitting silently at the door any more, no not my hip, happening, I got what you have been trying to teach me Lola. Nope she now just does her mess then runs for the bell to announce it.........I may be sloooooooooow but something tells me that something has been lost in translation somewhere.

Out witted by a dog with a brain the size of a pistachio......

5 comments:

KGould said...

I am really sorry but I had to laugh. And then laugh again. Somehow I knew that you were going to end up saying she rings the bell to let you know she made a mess ;) So sorry, I know this doesnt help you at all but she is SO CUTE!

I don't like doggy messes (who does??) but I had a 157lb Rottweiler with a bad tummy for a week. Clean that up, off carpet, and you might not mind little tiny doggie doodie anymore ;) hee!

I hope if you keep doing it, she will eventually get it right but I don't know. Sometimes you run into a pet who just doesn't 'get it'. It reminds me of when I had a border collie puppy. Normally they are quite smart, but mine took things too literally. We had been training him to pee on the spruce trees in his first puppy year instead of ruining the deciduous seedlings, flowers, veggie garden, etc... so what did he do on his first Christmas?


yes. you guessed it.

he whizzed on the christmas tree after giving it a good sniff. We bought fake trees after that. Yes there were presents under the tree. The one he got turned out to be a turkey platter.... turkey anyone?

Brad Cabana said...

Our dog does ring a strap of bells to let us know he wants out. I was sceptical, but my wife started him from the age of 6 weeks, and now it's just part of life. It could be he started too late? Anyway, soory to hear he poops and then lets you know:(

The Grey Lady said...

New Plan: Talked to doggie trainer guy and he says to ignore messes in front of Lola, NEVER let her witness me cleaning her messes, use Pet enzyme stuff to erase the scent of her preferred spots. Second half of the plan is set a timer for every half hour or so, take her to door, ring bell with her paw, put her on leash, take her outside, when she does business go nutz with praise and treats.

Dogs are fun non? They are work in some ways but I love what they add to a family...not in the offerings that Lola is currently adding, but still they are wonderful companions for children to grow up with.

I have decided to be optimistic.... we will crack this nut or go crazy trying.

The Grey Lady said...

Kez it is amazing how dogs and sometimes even people interpret what we are trying to get across to them. More often or not I am left shaking my head how they go from "A" to "G" when I was really trying to guide them to "Z".

It's a puzzlement.

Brad your wife is a better woman then I am, I had never even heard of this training technique. The breeder we got the dog from just told us to keep her area small and keep putting her on a "pee pad". Pee pads soon translated into anything that was on the floor, the mats at the doors, papers dropped by the children while doing homework....I should have taken a clue then and traded her in for the Newfoundlander that I got talked out of by my family.

KGould said...

My sister in law has a bell on her door for her dogs too lol. I had never seen that before either, just so you don't feel so alone :)

My boss has had lots of dogs and cats over the years, but one cat got the best of her. She was a beautiful himilayan. gorgeous creature. But the princess had the bathroom habits of a wart hog. The trainer suggested putting a litter box everywhere she 'went' to get her smartened up. No, instead my boss had about 6 litter boxes LOL. Then they suggested the cat was too prissy and didnt like going in the same area twice, so my boss bought a super duper deluxe litter box that cleaned itself everytime the cat stepped out. No - that scared the cat to death so she never went near it again. She continued to drop presents anywhere she pleased. So my boss ended up giving her to a friend on a ranch who kept all her cats in a nice cozy heated barn. Kitty has been happy there, dropping gifts left and right, but it doesn't matter there lol. UGH. A cat being like that surprises me more than a dog.

Your cat, on the other hand, is hysterical! That was just the funniest thing so I had to tell everyone I know about it today LOL. They laughed too :) Ring Ring - Dinner Time!