I hate to ruin a good male fantasy,

But if you need this to fight off the zombies,




Aren't the zombies already eating you?

Mind you, I bet this young lady could have used one:

During the struggle, the girl's calls to her mother were cut off at least three times. The girl somehow managed to call her mother back each time. A helpless Tsyganenkov could only listen in horror to her daughter's screams for mercy.
In a second call to her mother, Moskalyova said, "Mum, the bears are back. She came back and brought her three babies. They're... eating me," The Daily Mail reported.

I change my mind, because what do I know about  the most appropriate weapon for nuclear mutant Zombie fighting? I'm currently stuck with the grand plan of throwing day old biscuits at them...